Use me…

Dear God…I ask this night that you use me, that you use my life, that you take the wheel and make my existence profitable, beneficial, hopeful for others.  For as I go through the days and nights focusing on my grades, my finances, my fitness, my pedicure, my social calendar….not only do I become bored and uninspired, but I become profitless and listless.  I desire to feel alive, to feel apart of the miraculousness that is life.  I search for it in belongings, vices, experiences, but it all leaves me wanting, craving, needing.  I lie in bed aware of those who are starving, who are lonely and cold, crying out for recognition, for a witness to their existence…I walk through the rain feeling the tears of those who feel unanswered, unheard, unrecognized…I lay in the sun, grateful for its warmth while my thoughts drift to the souls of those without homes migrating without purpose across the scorching blacktop, the “concrete jungle” that is our city.  I used to work in the multi million dollar office of a real estate developer, sipping my over priced latte, concerned with what hot function to attend that weekend, while soulless souls, purposeless persons, forgotten fellows shuffled by my window.  I picked at my manicure, twirled my hair, and pondered on why I sat where I sat, and why they made comfort in our grass, grateful for a moments rest from the load they bare. God, please use me.  Whether for selfish reasons, for a desire that I cannot quench by my daily living, out of guilt for my blessings, or simply to connect to whatever it is yearning inside of me to infuse myself with the plight of those less fortunate than I.  God, please use me.  Please make right the lives of those that came before me through me.  What they were not able to overcome in their lifetime, please give me the strength to heal within myself for their peace.  God, please use me that I might be a vessel of power, comfort and inspiration to those in need.  God, please use me that my life will be of benefit to those that you would lift me up to meet and administer to.  God,  please give me the words and the understanding of the needs of others that I may be an instrument in Thy hands to bring peace to those who cry out, and those who know not how.  Let my agenda submit itself to yours, and my fears dissipate in the presence of Thy love and acceptance.  I thank Thee for the opportunity I have had to meet so many amazing brothers and sisters, and I ask that Thou would extend my circle to include those I never would have imagined.  I pray for the opportunity to experience those whom are different from me, those whom I can learn from, those who will make me uncomfortable and expand my acceptance and diversity.  I thank Thee for the many sources of inspiration along my journey, and I look forward to those that are yet to come.  Thank you for the fresh rain cleansing both our earth and our souls, and thank you in advance for the sun which will inhabit my flesh.  I love my life, and I thank you not only for the dance, but for the fight…for the peaks and the trenches.  I thank you for more than words can express…for those moments when only the silence will speak the song and gratitude of my soul.  I thank Thee and I ask that Thy blessings would be on those I know and love, those who inspire me, and for those who I have yet to meet or may never know.  I am truly blessed and eternally grateful. Thank you thus far and please don’t let Thy purpose for my life and the greater good die within me.

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