The relationship that you are in, or the one on its way, is a direct reflection of what resides inside of you. Men bashing, women bashing. It is a common occurence. What we fail to acknowledge or admit, is that we have control and influence in the matter. If it is not what you want, walk away. If it continues to materialize, better yourself. Timing has a lot to do with life, whether we embrace it or not. So many times throughout my journey, I have fought and argued with timing. I have always been someone who knows that I have the power to make anything happen, whether I live by that belief or not. At the end of the day, I know that if I want it, I have the will and the abilities to make it happen. So timing has been a very worthy adversary. So many hours spent arguing with this elusive and unseen opponent. I thought I knew best. I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it. I have come to make peace with Timing, although, almost always with a side of kicking and screaming. What’s ironic, is that once Timing “gives in” and delivers that which I had so positively wanted according to His time, it never really tastes or feels the same. I look at it almost confusedly. I wrestle with myself tryin to remember why I had ever wanted it in the first place. What I didn’t realize is that while I was busy wrestling with Timing, life went on and I evolved. So as I stood there face to face with the object of my desire, I realized that it existed in the past with a “lesser” version of myself, and I had indeed moved past it. There will be times in all of our lives when there is something that we so desperately want, or believe we need, but there seems to be a mountain range standing between us…it is in that moment that we would be best served to breathe, to witness our life and the process of living, and just wait. To continue walking, but to be a witness to our life, allowing ourselves to be changed by the process, having the faith that that which serves our highest self will eventually materialize. It may be that we have something to learn before we are ready for our desire so that we can ultimately enjoy it and appreciate it more, or that it is not in our best interest and only time will reveal that to our wiser selves. Be patient. Have faith. Laugh. Love. Live.
Author: shollandsworth
"Someone once told me the definition of hell: On the last day you have on earth, the person you became will meet the person you could have become." Anonymous.
And that would be a good place to begin. Often we know not what our purpose is until we think in terms of our eternal purpose. The moment I allowed my mind to expand to eternal proportions, it all came into full view. All of my micro passions and purposes could fall under one heavenly macro purpose banner. To live up to my potential, and pave the way for others to do the same.
As a child, I had an inner fire to learn everything I could to rise above the circumstances I was born into. It was like there was a scream in my soul. "I don't belong here, we don't belong here. Something is wrong here!" As a child I remember knowing I was born to rewrite the story. I can't imagine that is typical of most children. I recall wrestling with the decision between having play dates with friends or reading dates with myself. My mom and I would sojourn to our local library where I would faithfully check out the max number of books as they toppled out of my arms. The majority were non-fiction, particularly autobiographies of underdogs defying the odds.
I was born into two family lines riddled by addiction, anxiety and depression. I remember intrinsically knowing we were made for more. I have spent my life on a mission to choose differently. I have to credit my parents for instilling awareness in me. They had their struggles, but they always reminded me that things can be different. They may not have had the tools or strength to overcome their struggles, but they created a human who could and would. Awareness is half the battle. Too many grow up not knowing any different. They live reactionary lives imitating what they see and all they know. That is why I'm determined to educate and demonstrate that we are the creators of our reality, that we are not limited by circumstance or DNA. We are truly limitless.
I am a voracious reader who reads books that help unlock greatness and point to unlimited potential.
I am a writer who writes with the intention to unlock the inner hero begging to be released.
I am a personal trainer who trains others with the intent to show them that the only limits they have are those in their mind.
I am an athlete who had yet to achieve her potential because her mindset was broken and spirit was in bondage. It was the silent shame I carried throughout my life. I dedicated myself to studying how I could turn that shame into my superpower. I am now an athlete who gets to visibly demonstrate how truly limitless we really are. I am keenly aware that my movement conveys a powerful message. I know others are watching. I know the world needs this wake up call. I know I did. And I know I haven't even started yet.
So when I nearly died and lost my feet in the process, I knew I was being called to the mat so to speak. I was being offered the opportunity to demonstrate my beliefs for all to see. While I may have felt "why me," my soul knew I had been uniquely prepared for this challenge. My soul said "of course, me." And that was the North Star that guided me through the hell I would have to traverse alone. I set out on a journey with my Maker to find ME. The real me. All of me. Who I was capable of being. Possibly more importantly, I discovered who I WAS NOT. I was refined in the FIRE. I am here by the GRACE of God and the GRIT of myself. I became an alchemist, turning tragedy into triumph, loss into gain, victimhood into victory. I choose carefully for I know that I create my own reality.
PS you can read more about how I lost my feet here: https://saramae.co/2015/10/20/filling-in-the-blanks/.
I am a Speaker. I realize this is bigger than I am. It is my privilege to share my story in a way that conveys hope smothered in tough love and points toward freedom. We are capable of so much more than we can begin to comprehend. We can choose it and we can do so today. We simply need be WILLING, AUDACIOUS and RELENTLESS.
I am a Writer. Writing is where I first tasted freedom. It is where I am all of me, where I speak my full truth, and where I allow God to speak through me. My message bypasses my brain coming straight from my spirit. Heck, it comes from my cells. I write to say what needs to be said. I write not to make one think, but to make one act. My intention is not to make you feel good, or to think I am smart, but to get off your ass and live your life to the fullest. To live and love today to the fullest because it could be your last. Nothing is promised, not even the next second.
I am an athlete. It is an attitude, a swagger, a philosophy, a belief, a spirit. It is a commitment. Athletes aren't afraid to sweat and get dirty. They aren't afraid to try and "fail" because they know you only fail if you stay on the couch. And you can get off that couch this very second. I will push my athletic ability to the limits, and then I will push past them. There is no time clock, I will do this until the day I die. Where there is breath, there is hope and there is LIFE. I am ALIVE. I do not and I will not take that for granted. I move my body because I am blessed to do so because there are some who can't. There is always someone with less than you have doing more than you are. Make THEM proud. Honor their grit, thereby developing your own. Inspiration is tricky business. I don't want to be called inspiring as you scroll through Facebook. I want to INSPIRE your ACTION. I want to ELIMINATE your EXCUSES. My goals will continue to evolve because once I have ascended one mountain, I celebrate the view and then set my sights on the next. I am a runner with no feet whose wings span wide. I will run far and fly high.
I am a trainer. I am EXCUSELESS. Because I choose none for myself, I will accept none of yours. I am not for everybody, but I am for those who are hungry and committed to radically change their lives.
I am committed to doing my part to radically upgrade the dreams, expectations and lives of the collective whole. My inner hero, free spirit, champion craved existence and simply needed guidance on how to be born. I needed permission. I finally gave it to myself and now I offer it to you. I am here to remind those who need it that we were made for more.
The Phoenix Perspective is a Radical Responsibility Revolution. We have a zero tolerance policy for excuses. We make none and we accept none. Period. We know that we are more than our DNA, more than our CIRCUMSTANCES. We know that life is happening FOR us rather than TO us. We know that dying to who we thought ourselves to be so that we can become who we were meant to be is not only necessary, it is glorious. While it may not be comfortable, we know that the FIRE is our FRIEND. That it is a divine messenger sent to escort us to our higher selves. It is a message, a philosophy, a movement. It is an understanding and a vantage point. It is a challenge and an invitation. It is an initiation.
Reflection
“The mirror of relationships shows us where we need to grow, and guides us forward. ” Kathy Freston. Relationships are the topic of every female I know. We talk about it over wine, over coffee, over dessert, any chance we get. We pretend to try to figure out the key to a relationship. Ladies, let it be known, I do not believe there is a secret equation, or password. Don’t get me wrong, I think relationships are a beautiful thing. I think there are people who can elevate our potential, who can inspire us and encourage our best selves. I think that should be what we all strive for. It saddens me that so many people when they feel empty inside, or that there is something missing, look outside of themselves for a solution. They think that some accessory will heal their longings. Of course, nothing can. Instead of healing or growing those aspects within ourselves that need attention, we turn to someone else to complete us. Completion is an illusion. It is a prison that we put others in when we expect that from them. No one can complete us. It is our choice to find completion within ourselves in our current situations. It is not a destination, it is a state of mind, a choice, an empowerment, a constant evolution. Our version of completion today cannot hold a candle to what our completion will be further down the road…that is the blessing of age, of life, of growth. If we are unable to look within ourselves, to our essence, to our connection and relationship with life as the source of our joy, peace and inspiration, we may tragically miss out on our inherent potential grace and glory and the gifts imprinted in our beings. The answer is not around the next corner, it is in our own reflection in this moment. Get right with yourself, and all will align itself with your rightness. Peace. Love. Joy.
A blossom…
I believe that when a child is born to this life, they are born knowing their worth, their purpose, their power. I imagine God whispering in their ear while they are in the space between worlds…”there is nothing that you can’t do.” They are born with endless possibilities. As we observe children and their organic essence, we feel envious of their innocense, their naivate. Sadly, and naively, we extinguish their inherent fire and set out to teach them “the ways of the world.” We school them and do everything that we can to baptize them into the customs of this life in hopes that they avoid heartache and hardship. What is so hearbreaking about that, is that we often put out the flame that they brought with them from a better place. With them, they brought flames of hope, joy, peace, resilience…flames of faith and magic. They were imprinted with a purpose. It is only necessary that we, the adults, step back and learn from them. Listen–and let their actions teach us what is best for them. Yes, we are the protector; we need to make sure that they are fed, clothed, loved and safe. What we must realize is that we cannot save them from life and from the path that they need to travel. There will be passions and joys that burn within their hearts, and the greatest thing we can do in this life is to support and encourage those flames. There is a realm of possibility that exists waiting to be brought into existence. Every second, there is a new soul born, ready and able to be the vessel of change. As you hold your child, listen and imagine that it just may be them who is here to discover the cure for cancer, who holds the answer to a world without war, without starvation. Your child may lead millions, or infuse happiness and joy into the lives of those they pass on the streets. They have greatness inside of them and it is not up to us to decide what is best for them, but to allow them to show us what is best for them, for us, and for the world. I will never forget the words of Will Smith to his son in The Pursuit of Happyness: “Don’t ever let somebody tell you you can’t do something. Not even me. Alright?…You got a dream? You gotta protect it. ..People can’t do something themselves…they wanna tell you you can’t do it. ..you want something, go get it. Period.” Next time we have the urge to protect someone by saying that what they are trying to do is unrealistic, hard, impossible…hesitate and choose a better path. This child might have the power of Mother Theresa or Martin Luther King, Jr. inside of them. See every child as sacred and powerful. Treat them as such.
SaraMae Hollandsworth 