Running in place

Well my body has come to a crashing halt.  For those of you who know me, fitness is my life, my identity, my companion.  At various points along my journey, I have forced it into the backseat, but it is always with me.  I, know full well what it takes to live an optimally healthy life.  Do I always entertain that knowledge?  Obviously not.  I am the poster child for type a personality.  I am always striving, always achieving, never relaxing, never just being.  I have been doing better these last few years, but I have recently fallen into my old patterns.  My body decided to teach me a lesson.  I have millions of obligations yet the world goes on without me.   My workload is piling up, yet I know it will get done.  It has allowed me to ponder on what I have missed during this never ending race that I have been running.  There have been flashes out of the corner of my eyes, I have felt things blow by me, heard whispers of the unknown, unrecognized.  Now that I am stopped, the flashes, the “things” and the whispers have become clear.  They are sunsets, sunrises, first blooms, first snows, deer, eagles, lillies.  They are my friends and my family, and all of the beautiful events in their lives.  I have allowed myself to believe that there would be an end to this race, and that at that end, everything would be waiting for me, I would be waiting.  What this stillness has allowed me to realize is that not only am I missing out on my life, but on the lives of the amazing people that I have been blessed to know and to love.  There are countless beautiful relationships and moments waiting yet not waiting for me.  You see, life has continued on without me, without my awareness, my recognition.  I am a little older, but I have missed so much.  I expected everything to wait, but life and living waits on no one.  All we have is today.  Tomorrow and There are illusions.  We cannot wait until we are done with school, have enough money in the bank, a bigger house, a family, retirement, til tomorrow to start living.  Today is the only today that we will have.  Today may involve a birth, a death, a full moon, a shooting star.  It may include a friend in need that we may be too busy to serve, it may include a friend who wants to lighten our burden, but we are too proud to allow them to.  There is infinite beauty borne in today.  Today is sacred, today is precious, today is priceless.  Live it as such.  Honor it.  Cherish it.  Respect it.  Do what you need to do to give yourself the room, the space, and the time to include all areas of your life.  Live holistically, live authentically, live vivaciously. This is my hope.

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